Ode to a Year

♫JANUARY♫

1. Who kissed you on New Year's?
That would be Joshua Geiger... New Year's 2008... I was freaking out because my roommate threw a party and I didn't know anyone and I kind of had a panic attack, so I ran away to Josh's house and spent an evening watching movies with him and Michelle.

2. Did you have a New Year's resolution this year?
I had a list of 31. I think the only one I accomplished was carving a pumpkin.

3. Does it snow where you live?
Once in awhile.

4. Do you like hot chocolate?
Yes. :)

5. Have you ever been to Times Square to watch the ball drop?
No, but that would be fun, I think, with the right people in tow.

♫FEBRUARY♫

1. Who was your Valentine?
Joshua Geiger, and it was the most amazing Valentine's Day ever.

2. When you were little did you buy Valentine's for the whole class?
Yes, but it always made me nervous.

3. Do you care if the groundhog sees its shadow or not?
No... but probably come March I will.

4. Something special in February?
Valentine's Day is fun.

♫MARCH♫

1. Are you Irish?
A quarter.

2. Do you wear green every Year on St. Patrick's Day?
I always forget, but I like to pinch.

3. What did you do for St. Patty's Day in 2008?
I don't remember... but I do think I forgot to wear green.

4. Are you happy when winter is pretty much over?
Yes, but I'm always antsy waiting for it to get here too.

5. Something special in March?
Both of my parents' birthdays are in March... two days apart... and then in another two days is my grandmother and cousin's birthday.

♫APRIL♫

1. Do you like the rain?
I love it. All kinds of rainy days... slow and soft rain, big torrential thunderstorms... bring it on!

2. Did you play an April Fools joke on anyone this year?
No.

3. Do you get tons of candy on Easter?
Not really anymore :(

4. Do you celebrate 4/20?
Nope.

5. Something special in April?
My grandpa's birthday.

♫MAY♫

1. What is your favorite flower?
Roses, preferably red ones.

2 Anything special in May?
Well, from 2009 it will be my WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!!!! (May 16 is the official date.)

3. Finish the phrase "April showers..."
... bring May flowers.

4. Do you celebrate May 16th:
I don't know why this date is special for other people, but it's going to be my wedding anniversary.


♫JUNE♫

1. Did you do anything fun during this month?
Let's see... in June 2008 I was horribly depressed because Joshua was gone to India and I was having a really difficult time being alone in Asheville. But God did amazing things that summer in me, so even though it wasn't fun, it was worth it.

2. Have a favorite baseball team?
No.

♫JULY♫

1. Did you go on any vacations?
I went to Myrtle Beach, SC to visit Michelle... and Dacia and Jessy came up to visit me for a weekend.

2. Do you blast the A/C all day?
Eh, it's not too bad up here.

♫AUGUST♫

1. Did you do anything special at the end of your summer?
Joshua Geiger came home from India and it was the most wonderful, anticipated moment ever.

3. Did you have a sunburn?
I think it's impossible to get a sunburn in North Carolina.

4. Did you go to the pool a lot?
Nope. I haven't been in a pool since I don't even remember.

5. Anything special happen in August?
God totally rearranged our lives for us. That's always awesome. :)

♫SEPTEMBER♫

1. Will you be attending college/school?
I'm done with school for the time being.

2. Do you like fall better than summer?
After being here for both of those seasons this year, I realize what an impossible choice that is. Summertime... swimming at waterfalls and swimming holes... hiking... splashing in creeks... fireflies... blueberry picking. Autumn... beautiful foliage... apple cider... first hint of cold weather... yes, an impossible decision.

3. What did you do on September 11th?
I have no idea.

♫OCTOBER♫

1. What was your last Halloween costume?
The last time I dressed up for Halloween, I was a chubby bumble bee and very cute.

2. What is your favorite candy?
M&Ms

3. Whose birthday is this month?
October... Michelle!

4. What is your favorite thing about this month?
I think carving pumpkins will be my new favorite thing about October. Something I hadn't done before this year.

♫NOVEMBER♫

1. Whose house do you go to for Thanksgiving?
Joshua's family's house in Melbourne... it was fun meeting everyone and being announced as the wife-to-be.

2. Whats best about this month?
Autumn is in its full glory in the mountains here. Thanksgiving!

3. What are you thankful for?
Everything Jesus did in me and in my life this year. Being 137 days away from marrying the love of my life. Friends, family, and fun memories.

4. Do you love stuffing?
Yessssss... I really don't think there is a better bite than turkey, gravy, stuffing and cranberry sauce all together... mmmmmmmmm...

♫DECEMBER♫

1. Do you celebrate Christmas?
Yes!

2. What is December 1st, 2007?
The day the Christmas countdown begins. Carols are totally playing 24/7.

3. Have you ever been kissed under the mistletoe?
No. Still! :(

4. Get anything special last year?
Joshua spent a lot of his hard earned money to buy me an iPod.

5. What do you want this year?
Well, it's a little late for that, isn't it? I think I got everything on my list, actually.

6. Do you like cold weather?
Love it!

________________________________________________________________

Well, I'm working on my 101 in 1001 list (it's sort of a resolution thing), but it won't be completed tonight. I'll share the gist and the list with you soon. Maybe it will inspire you to do your own!

Happy New Year, everyone!

Wedding date

Okay, if you had put the 26th of April on your calendar, take it off.

Joshua and I are now trying to decide on a new wedding date because we found out that our pastor isn't available to marry us on the 26th.

Choosing a date is harder than I thought it would be, especially with so many out-of-towners and a short engagement.

Going to the venue we're hoping for this afternoon. Wish me Godspeed!

Story of the proposal

So here's the story for those of you who have not yet heard:

Saturday night was the Highland staff Christmas party, complete with a white elephant gift exchange. I brought a CD because I figured I would be nice and give someone something other than junk, and Josh told me he had wrapped some funny glasses (the kind with the nose and mustache attached) for his gift. I had absolutely no suspicions whatsoever, because I knew days before the party that he was planning on using the glasses as his gift. Little did I know, Saturday morning the jeweler called Josh to tell him the ring was ready, and so I had a surprise in store for me.

Joshua is a fabulous gift wrapper. Seriously, professional-quality wrapping skills. He came to pick me up on Saturday night and I saw his present... beautifully wrapped in shiny blue paper with a big red ribbon wrapped around it and tied in a bow.

In the car ahead of us, Mary called everyone who would be at the party and told them that during the gift exchange they were not to choose the blue present with the red bow. When the exchange started that evening, the only rule Mary emphasized was that the last person to go could steal anyone's gift, but whoever they stole from MUST go and get the last present left underneath the tree. Of course, they had rigged the game so that Joshua had the highest number and would be last to go. And of course no one picked his present during their respective trips to the tree, and so the blue present with the red bow was the last one left. And of course, when it was Joshua's turn, he stole my present.

This made me really mad. One, because earlier in the game I had told him to move his present more to the forefront, because it was hiding in the back corner and no one was choosing it. I thought they must just be overlooking it, because surely someone would have picked the beautifully wrapped box over what was obviously a ginormous television set originally bought circa 1977. He told me it was fine. Second, I had a wall sconce shaped like a musical staff and the notes were where you would put little votive candles and I thought it was delightful. When he stole it from me, I made a big stink about it, because first of all, I liked it, and second of all, he could've stolen something really great (like a Clapper!) from somebody else so we could've gone home with two cool presents. Now I had to go under the tree and his was the only present left and I knew it was those ugly glasses.

I stomped over to the tree. "I don't want this one," I said. Scooping up the present I shook it in Josh's face. "Are you just really attached to these or something? This is your present!" Someone jokingly called out that I should save the paper, so just out of spite I ripped it off with extra gusto. I opened up the box to see some ugly pair of glasses

and there was the ring box.

OH. MY. GOSH.

Josh took the ring box and dropped down to one knee and I sucked in the hugest gasp. Is he actually getting down on one knee? In front of all these people? I was just such a turd about opening this present! He took my hand in his and started a soliloquy of sweet words about how my name means "precious pearl" and I am God's precious pearl and his precious pearl. And how Jesus told the parable about the man who found a pearl of great price and he went and sold all he had to buy it, Josh was willing to sacrifice everything for me. It was very romantic, and made half the room cry, and then he asked,

"Megan Elizabeth, will you marry me?"

I let out a shaky but sure yes and he put the ring on my finger!

And-- viola!-- we're engaged. And come April my initials will be M.E.G.

Megan
Elizabeth
Geiger

I've always secretly wanted that. God's a baller.

It's official

Joshua Geiger and I are engaged to be married!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't stop smiling.

Save the date for April 26. Tentatively.

Currently

READING Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver. If you are into nutrition or sustainable living you will absolutely love this book. Check it out from your local library-- Kingsolver is a widely recognized author (both fiction and nonfiction works) and will probably be on the shelves. It's a fun narrative of one family's ambition to eat locally for a year and her poetic prose mixed with sobering facts get you hooked line and sinker.
WATCHING LOST Season 3 (and soon Season 4) to catch up before Season 5 premieres on January 21. I have finally found a friend in NC (yay, Brittney!) who gets sucked into that show as much as I do.
LISTENING to Kim Walker's We Cry Out album.
PONDERING life, emotions, and wounds.
ATTEMPTING to get myself in the mood to put away all my clean laundry... yuck.
PRAYING for the lost, for the wounded, for those I love, for God to transform my heart.
HOPING that Bryan will be able to fix the computer quickly when he gets home...
EXPERIENCING some sort of breakthrough which has been long in coming and leaves me feeling energized and intentional.
LOVING Joshua Geiger. For real.
HATING my tendency toward laziness. Yuck!
DESIRING more of Jesus... every day, every hour, in every way... please!

Somehow yesterday slipped past me

Isn't it interesting how life just kind of slips through your fingertips like sand?
I think there is something to be said for intentionality.

I generally think I'm a person who doesn't watch that much television, but I wonder how many hours a week I really spend sitting in front of a box.
I wonder if I didn't watch any television or movies how my life would change.
Why is it that we are so engrossed by what we watch?
That has to say something about how we're made and what we long for.

2008 is almost over.
Have you ever considered how many more years this planet will exist?
How long the United States of America will exist as a nation?

I think so narrowly, confined to this itty bitty box when reality is SO MUCH BIGGER.
I pray that I will truly learn to live as a stranger passing through... and that my eyes would be opened to the real picture.

Does anyone already have any resolutions for 2009?
I can't really decide on one. And I think I might actually like to try just one this year instead of making an infinitely long list and then being overwhelmed by all my good intentions and lack of self-discipline.

Laundry calling.

Later, taters.

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Things not to do on a cold winter night: stand outside of a restaurant to chat.

Meme time. A music meme. Stolen from Jules.

Put your music on shuffle and take the first line of the first 20 songs that come up and make a song.

Call on your angels
I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
I want a little sugar in my bowl
Listen everybody.

Don't wish, don't start
My soul is as open as the sky
Maybe it's much too early in the game
Finally I figured out but it took a long, long time.

He was a famous trumpet man from the Chicago way
When marimba rhythms start to play
Lord of heaven and earth
Every time I fall down on my face.

Silent night, holy night
At last my love has come along
He set my soul at ease
Hey Jude don't make it bad.

Oh, how He loves us, oh...

Okay, so my friend Brittney introduced me to this song by Kim Walker and I am absolutely in love with it. The first time I listened to it I had tears streaming down my face. Oh, how He loves us, oh...!

Tomorrow Joshua and I are going to get the license plates for our new car so we should be tootling around town soon enough... and there is rumor that we might be doing some engagement ring sizing as well... eek! :)

God has just been such an incredible Giver to us lately... car, diamond ring... in spite of the current economic situation in the U.S. It's really put me on a different path, I think, because I hear so much anxiety and worry coming from the mouths of everyone and while I can acknowledge the basis of their fears, I have no emotional connection to that mentality whatsoever. The reality that the God we love is bigger than the economy of this one nation is so tangible to me right now, people probably think I'm a little nuts when I just smile in the face of uncertainty and recession and praise the Lord for His provision. It's so freeing to be loved by a God who is not bound by human invention.

Yay, God!

W

Who am I going to be in twenty years?

What is your heart's desire?

When will fairytales cease to exist?

Where does one find the perfect romance?

Why do women love to be swept away?


These deep and delving questions after a viewing of 13 Going on 30 with Victoria and Stephanie. ;)

Treacherous Tuesday

treach' er·ous (trech' ә-rәs) adj. deceptive; unreliable.

e·mo'tion (i-mō' shәn) n. a state of mind in which feeling, sentiment, or attitude is predominant (over cognition and volition).

Treacherous Tuesday. A day in which Megan is experiencing a deceptive and unreliable state of mind in which feeling, sentiment, and attitude are predominant over rational thought and willpower.

I think that the fact that I realize this is a point in my favor. There are a couple things that I know to do in order to shift the balance from feelings to fact:

1) Speak the truth.
2) Give thanks.
3) Focus on someone other than myself.

The truth is that feelings do not operate the train that is my life-- faith and facts do. Facts such as...

I am an eternal being and this life is not my own.
Feelings, while sometimes pleasant, often lie.
God is so much better than I can infinitely imagine.
He knows my heart and loves me. He has wonderful, adventurous plans for me.
Even when my feelings tell me otherwise, it is possible to experience complete satisfaction and fulfillment in Christ alone.

I am still reading Crazy Love and in it there is this quote from the book God is the Gospel that says, "The critical question for our generation-- and for every generation-- is this: If you could have heaven, with no sickness, and with all the friends you ever had on earth, and all the food you ever liked, and all the leisure activities you ever enjoyed, and all the natural beauties you ever saw, all the physical pleasures you ever tasted, and no human conflict or any natural disasters, could you be satisfied with heaven, if Christ was not there?"

When I read that it was just like a knife in the chest. Because I am guilty; because it is quite possible that I would be okay with that. The realization that I don't love God as I ought was like ice water in my face. I've been struggling since I read that, because self-condemnation is something that comes easy to me... but now I am starting to look at myself truthfully and see the hope that is there. It is true that I do not love God as I ought. But that is like a half-truth if I leave it there, because just to say that completely ignores the desire to love God more that he himself has placed in my heart. And he who began a good work in me will bring it to completion, amen! So my prayer today is, "Help! The pitiful amount of love and desire I have for you leaves me ashamed... The truth is that I love me. Change my heart." And I have hope, because he will. Is that not good news? O, praise him!

I am thankful for God's unending faithfulness... so thankful that his desire and love for me is beyond my comprehension. Thankful that he hears my prayer and that he will give me a heart that loves him with a crazy love. I am thankful for friendships and companionship on the journey and women (like Brittney and Mary) who are willing to listen and love. I am thankful that I don't have to have everything figured out; that life can be an adventure; that I can live for something more than money, power, or myself. I am thankful for freshly sharpened pencils and new journals full of blank pages yet to be filled. I am thankful for tastebuds and the ability to smell... glorious smells like freshly baked bread, or brewing coffee, or the sky just before it rains, or the scent of Joshua's skin mixed with the smell of his soap. I am thankful for all kinds of weather... sunshine and rainstorms and snow that falls softly and silently. I am thankful for love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control.

And now, to focus on Someone other than myself. Abiding. Loving. Desiring.

Bring it on.

Until Wonderful Wednesday, everyone. Here is one of my new favorite music videos to leave you with...

Back again!

So sorry for the week-long absence...

'Twas a whirlwind trip to Florida and I think I could use a vacation upon my return to Asheville. You know how it goes.

Highlights of the trip include:
. spending time with my mom and dad .
. a meal at the Cheesecake Factory .
. a visit to the beach .
. seeing my sister-in-love .
. meeting all of my beloved's family and being announced as the wife-to-be .
. an afternoon with my grandparents and listening to stories about the Shades of Weehawken .
. decorating my parents' home for Christmas .
. Joshua asking for (and receiving) my father's blessing for us to get married .
. inheriting a beautiful engagement ring .
. lunch on the St. Petersburg pier with two of our best friends .

Although this will seem backward after what you just read, Joshua and I are still not engaged. I would really like to be asked, and he would really like to ask me. You know, the proposal where he gets down on one knee. :) So I suppose that will be coming up sometime soon. And then I will get to post pictures of the beautiful ring that was my Nana's.

Hopefully I will wake up tomorrow in a winter wonderland. Snow expected.

XOXO.